In my May-December Marriage Timing was everything (and my husband is painfully honest)
Last night I took part in this really fun Huffington Post Live segment May-December Marriage Can age differences place a strain on marriage when your husband is old enough to be your father– in other words can your marriage still work? Is it even better for couples? What about older women marrying much younger men?
http://minglovemark.tumblr.com
Although people immediately assume I am a member of the second wives club (and each time I politely correct them and say, nay my husband who is 15 years my senior was just a late bloomer and was not ready to be saddled down with the old ball and chain until the ripe old age of 40) I am a first wife.
My daughter- who has become utterly fascinated by the huge age gap between my husband and I recently asked my husband why, after all those years of being alone did he finally choose me? While I was convinced he would say something to the effect of, your mommy was just so perfect in every way- his initial response…timing. (Followed up by the obligatory, oh she was so beautiful, kind, caring and liked Chinese food as much as I do).
When I heard it– it made perfect sense. Like everything else in life– what makes this life ( mainly just a series of events strung together) are those moments of pure joy. When the stars align- and in your heart and your head you feel ready to take that next big step and if the right person just so happens to show up- and it feels good- you will take that leap.
Not that I don’t feel like ours is a love story- because I do ( we were after all engaged after just three months of dating) and while I’d like to attribute it to the fact that I was just a take your breath away kind of gal (and of course younger which apparently means I had this fertility radar just emitting from almost every part of me drawing him in) I also know that up until he turned 40 my husband wasn’t ready and Angelina Jolie could’ve thrown herself at him and he still would’ve declined her advances.
In fact my husband and I are JUST like Hugh Hefner and his favorite younger lady of the month.. minus of course the taut skin of a twenty-something, and the wads of cash propping up Mr. Hefner.
I wonder do you think timing is everything?
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For many years before settling down, I was a serial monogamist. So for me, timing was not everything. It's not that I hated being single, but that I just liked being in a relationship so much more. Most of the relationships lasted exactly 9 months until we got sick of each other. But I've been with my partner for 7 years now, and expect to be for at least another 70. What changed? I think I just happened to be lucky enough to start a relationship with someone I was supremely compatible with. We complement each other so exactly that it's impossible to imagine living life without this perfect companion to help me along the way.